Cosmic Researcher T-Shirts

'It's THEM.'

"Good game."

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

...and then I...wait....What's that?? Whoa! We're on a spaceship! This is fun! Hey! What's this button do? Can I pull this lever? Are we there yet? Take a selfie with us? Do we get snacks? Can I drive? Are we there yet? Something we said? Just imagine if we'd been obnoxious!

Molecular Biology and Cosmology buildings

Outer Space Outsourcing

"This year we decided to vacation on the 3rd rock."

'But what is the universe for?'

"Oh, great - They changed the Meaning of Life again."

The difference between cosmology and cosmetology.

"An un-observed universe ceases to exist. Yeah right!"

God Sneezes Out Creation

Questions about an old case refuse to go away. . .

Chiller Theatre

Martha Stewart Takes Over The Universe

'BANG' and a cosmology institute appears.

"When we're home, are we still aliens?"

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

Zenemies.

"Did you remember to back up the last 4.5 billion years?"

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

"It's the dawn of a new era"

'This is embarrassing. By MY calculations, the universe should have collapsed in on itself last Wednesday.'

"Whatever it is, we're up to our necks in it!"

"I didn't come all this way to do work."

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

"We're going to the Vet aren't we."

The Origins of Everything

"I've had it with the helmet mandates."

Right, this is the map of all the UFO sightings. Hold the light steady love.

'We studied the Big Dipper and the Little Dipper today. May I have an ice cream cone?'

"...Ooh, I wanna know more about your dark side!"