Cosmic Humor Lover Gifts

'Just checking.'

"Be realistic, how can lumps of rock zooming around in space affect our lives down here?"

"What am I, chopped liver?"

'This place lacks atmosphere.'

Space Shuttle.

'Will you stop sulking? -- I didn't eclipse you on purpose!'

Adam and Eve

"It's sad to see that my old pal from the solar system is no longer with us..."

"You're quite the pick up artist!"

Interplanetary Transaction

Caution a rip in the space/time continuum. Police Aware.

'Your allergy tests suggest that you may have been intended for life on another planet.'

"It's boring up here. The moon just has no atmosphere."

"Thank you earthlings, without your space junk we would be nothing."

'Lifeforms, yes. Intelligence? Not sure yet!'

Gesundheit!

On 3rd November 2008, a solitary asteroid missed our planet.

'Whoa! Dude! I think that was meant for YOU!'

First Contact

"Orbistic medicine? You treat whole planets? I never heard of such a thing."

"Uh-oh, there go the dinosaurs."

"I don't need to check your chart! The best time for you to have surgery is right now!"

'I'm NOT sweating -- those are OCEANS!'

'It looked a lot bigger through the telescope.'

"Now remember not to give away the big surprise!"

We don't like the term invasion. We prefer galaxy gentrification.

Letters of recommendation don't carry any weight up here.

Actually, I think you looked better with Atlantis.

"It's scary that humans are our benchmark for intelligent life in the universe."

"...but that equals 243 Earth days!"

"And the Hungriest Black Hole there ever was ate everything in the entire universe and lived happily ever after."

"Remember, there's an additional charge if you don't refill the tank before you return it."

CX916960

"You don't have to pretend to review data with us, we know we were only along for the milk."

Deported