Cosmic Humor Aficionado T-Shirts

''Peace and brotherhood'? You bet, pal -- Just put this nice hat on.'

'Honest -- I had no idea they could jump that high!'

'Now, for the sake of argument, let's assume the sun will explode a week from Thursday.'

"Have you tried turning it off and turning it back on again?"

'Houston, I'm prepared to land...'

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

God Sneezes Out Creation

'You've orbited the Earth in a NASA spacecraft! Wow! Me, I've jumped over the Moon...'

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

Clown God

Man at penthouse party walks out onto terrace and is startled to see the Earth, instead of the moon, shining in the sky.

"Some mid-life crisis that turned out to be."

"And the Hungriest Black Hole there ever was ate everything in the entire universe and lived happily ever after."

'...and at this point I'm afraid the tax laws become totally theoretical.'

"I'm so sorry I let you talk me into letting you take your pet along on this trip!"

Black Hole Research Institute - Office only has IN tray - no OUT tray.

"We've come all this way to destroy their planet only to find they're doing it themselves!!!"

"It's scary that humans are our benchmark for intelligent life in the universe."

"Sorry to bother you again but I forgot to ask you to fill out our service evaluation questionnaire."

"Shall we put it in play?"

Solar Gain: "Be honest: does the new planet make me look fat?"

Mars Rover

"Does someone want to go on a space walk? Who wants to go on a space walk....?"

"Wow! - String Theory must be true after all..!"

First Contact

'And the actual value of the Hubble Constant is critical to the question or whether our Universe will continue to expand forever, or...POP.'

'A globe warming party?...Guys, you shouldn't have!'

Asteroid Bennu

You are Here

'Oh, sure -- but He won't let US have pets!'

UFO Society: Abducted for Lunch

"That's want I call a meteor shower!"

'Hey, I said I was an enchanted prince! I mentioned nothing about being from earth!'