Cosmetology Buffs Pillows

Frank & Ernest. Signe Painted. Cosmetology Dept. That should be "cosmology"! Why do you always get those two confused? I always think the one about space should have an "et" in it.

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

Bad hair day!

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

Dating is so expensive...

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

"Whoa. Jeff. Looks like you got that job at the cosmetic testing lab."

Pampered and poodled.

"Too much concealer?"

'Be ready in a minute - just have to put on my face.'

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

Emergency numbers on a telephone.

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

"I don't like your application."

What price beauty?

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

"Really? You can make me look younger!"

"I feel bad for the companies that make lipstick."

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

'I'm not begging, I've just painted my claws.'

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

"I'm not trying to be beautiful, I'm only trying to look better than everyone else there."

It was time for a little bit of lady admin

'Of course she hasn't aged a bit. She's married to a plastic surgeon!'

New Twenty Blades

"Hair spray"

Your presentation will be terrific. I was up all night, but something's still missing. Here. I've got just what you need. How thoughtful! Eye concealer! No need to thank me.

Cosmetics. Helps get rid of crow's feet.

'I'm still hot. It just comes in flashes now.'

'Here's my fail proof way to restore a youthful appearance - a 30 watt bulb.'

"We're having a make up test at school. Can I borrow your mascara?"

"We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?"

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall, go to hell."

Mirror mirror...

'Botox...'