Cosmetic Treatment Enthusiasts Gifts

'Now you do realise that we're unable to cure your ugliness don't you?'

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

"Snow White swears by these 10 products for flawless beauty."

Hairy men taking advantage of the laser tag/laser hair removal combo package.

"Eternally youthful complexion? Here's the deal. Never go out in the sun. Never eat dessert. And, for God's sake, don't smile."

"That product you are using is fantastic. Your eye bags are gone."

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

'This facial cream is called 'High Definition'...it brings out beauty in sharp, wonderful detail.'

Frank & Ernest. Signe Painted. Cosmetology Dept. That should be "cosmology"! Why do you always get those two confused? I always think the one about space should have an "et" in it.

"Hair spray"

Desert Dermatologist

"If they do let anyone go I don't think age will be a consideration. You shouldn't kill yourself trying to look younger than you are."

Cosmetics. Helps get rid of crow's feet.

Sunburn lotion, Windburn lotion.

"Yikes! So many foundations, so little time."

Dr. and Mrs. Steven Mueller.

'Slices Mandy! Just slices!'

'We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?'

'Bradley is a strict vegetarian. Do you have broccoli flavored lipstick?'

"How come your skin is sooooo smooth?"

'Botox.'

"Apricot pit?! Are you kidding, Mister? This stuff knocks raw avocado and almond nut outta the water!!!"

'Got anything with a little less musk?'

"She won't be long, I'm just putting her face on."

"Believe me, you never looked better since you fell into that vast of skin cream."

'Medium well, please.'

'Recent studies have demonstrated that what we believed were ritual sacrifices to Gods, were unsuccessful attempts to do breast implant surgeries."'

'Believe me, sweetie, if I thought the 'Wrinkle Out' setting on the clothes dryer would work...'

'If you want them balanced, it'll be an extra 250 dollars.'

Woman leaves cosmetic surgery as her waste skin is dumped in skip.

'Yeh it's just that I haven't been able to swim on my front,since my boob job.'

'Mildred....is that you?'

"Now, open your cosmetics fridge and delicately apply the cold hard cash to the area around your eyes."

"Looks like Mom is practicing getting her mask ready for Halloween tomorrow."