Cosmetic Science Nerd T-Shirts

'Er...the botox injections of Dorian Gray?'

Ascent of Machine.

"With less ice these days this provides better camouflage."

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

"Did you check the SPF, dear?"

"Whoa. Jeff. Looks like you got that job at the cosmetic testing lab."

For heavens sake,put some make-up on!

'I ask her to make up her mind. So she powders her forehead.'

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

Vaccine

Why weren't we born rich instead of beautiful?

"They've got me doing cosmetics research."

'Okay, I see it now...lame in the third hind leg on the left side!'

"Nasty sunburn."

"You looked a lot bigger on your dating profile."

"I get the strange feeling this has happened before."

Charles Darwin

Free Radicals.

'Of course she hasn't aged a bit. She's married to a plastic surgeon!'

"Hair spray"

Cosmetics. Helps get rid of crow's feet.

"Of course you'll study Latin. How else will you learn the names of your dinosaur friends."

"We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?"

Asteroid Denying Dinosaur vs. Asteroid Believing Dinosaur.

Professor Swizzlestix explains his point....

"My first Father's day!"

'It's not the global warming it's the humidity.'

'But we just don't have the technology to carry it out.'

"This is the 'carboniferous' age and we're here in the 'Carbs-Are-Really-Bad-For-Us' Age."

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

A small man under a giant microscope.

'We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?'