Cork-popping Champion T-Shirts

Driver at Grand Prix shooting another driver with the cork from champagne

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

"Can you recommend a wine that would compliment a divorce?"

Of pitting his own wits against their natural cunning

"In our house the four major food groups are Bordeaux, Merlot, Chardonnay and Champagne."

true love.

'Are you sure this wine is ten years old?' - 'Yes, I remember opening it ten years ago.'

'I've written six books on wine; owned my own winery and taught a wine class for two years. My next goal is to taste some.'

Man Trying to Uncork Champagne.

An Excellent Nose for Wine.

Red Wine

"When a wine rates over ninety, this is not alcoholism."

"I've tried that one; it's a blend of 74 different red grapes - including two of the plastic decorative type."

'There's over 500,000 different wines? Bernie, we've got work to do!'

Wino Appreciation Group

"I've joined a wine-lovers club. . . so far there are only three members."

"Can you recommend a suitable white wine to drink with my red wine?"

'Who took the cork out of my lunch?'

"Now this is a Francis Ford Coppola. We still haven't been here quite long enough to be drinkable ourselves."

"And would you like a wine stopper?"

'Move? Are you kidding? With the wines the guy next door collects?'

'Would Sir like to smell the screw-top?'

'The greatest wine in my collection? Why, it's my '45 Chateau Palmer and, oh, what a coincidence, it's right here!'

"This wine is CORKED!"

"I had no idea Dom Perignon came with a screw top."

'It's got worse than just the occasional sploosh from a wine box, hasn't it?'

Baby sucks cork on Australian's bush hat.

A little fizz?

Wine-tasting Tour.

Butler and his friend drinking in a cellar

"I wasn't sure if the wine was breathing, so I've been giving it mouth to mouth."

'You said you wanted a book on how to enjoy wine. This is the only 'book' you need.'

Larry Was Into Fine Wines.

Amateurs de vin...