Copy Machine Conqueror T-Shirts

'Today's Odds' sign above a copier showing various odds for machine's malfunctions

Rage.

Second lifeReal life.

"Our Rupert has swopped his gaming console for bagpipes...it gets us out of the house more often."

"Must get a longer cable."

Yoga To-Do

"...when you're through in there, my kids room could use a demonstration too."

'There's an app you can program to delete your trash? I've had one for years called Dave.'

'These new video games are getting out of hand...'

"But mom, all you said was 'get all your stuff up off the floor!' "

"I'm going to be vacuuming, if you want to go into the farthest room and start asking me questions."

"Damn it, Gwendolyn, you know when you married me I only moved one square at a time."

"Go ahead. Click on 'I Am Not A Robot.' I dare you."

"Sometimes Bob just needs a little motivation to get things done around here!"

'Since it's Mother's Day, we'd like you to take the day off.'

'I am not a robot.'

"Walking down here and asking if I can get you some more detergent from the store is just the beginning of my fence-mending agenda."

'It's about your reports, Mittens. They're incomprehensible -- It's as if you walked across the keyboard, laid down and rolled over it a hundred times, then took a nap on it.'

Whack-A-Chore: "You play it all day, every day, until you can't anymore."

Access Denied!

"...and how often do you feel monkas?"

"No monsters under this bed! After I cleaned there's no room."

'Rubbing it no longer produces a genie. Now you need a username, password and an unreadable CAPTCHA.'

"Where do you see yourself in five moves?"

'Really, it will be fine. Go home and give it a try. Wash lights with lights and darks with darks.'

"Thanks for the offer... but I'd rather see if tech support can get my computer running."

"I reached Level Three of Super Mario Brothers!"

Cleaner being carried away on a magic carpet.

'No breakfast until you're finished making your bed, Joey.'

Art Theft

"It's worth a try! Maybe someone up there knows how to fold a fitted bedsheet!"

'Why is it I can see what needs doing around here and you can't? . . . I know what cures that. . . 'Chores-ercise'.'

"We'll never have to fold fitted sheets again."

To do list

"Yes! I defeated the invading forces! I am master and commander... I am a warlord!"