Cookout Master T-Shirts

"Honey - get the smoke can. The guests are starting to swarm all over the bee hives again."

'Let the creepy crawly hunt begin!'

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

Barbequer wears apron with 'Beer in -beer out' slogan.

Counting ribs

Frank moonlights as a Grill Sergeant.

"Whenever he shows up everything turns to crap!"

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

T-Bones STEAK House...NO sissy salad bar!...Heimlich expert always on duty'

"You're turn to grill tonight Adam, you make the best ribs."

'Steak Ted?'

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

'Oh, and I suppose I'm the only one who's ever heard it's a 'dog eat dog world'?'

"I've just barbecued my head again."

'On the contrary... I'm too tough for the steak!'

Desert Island BBQ

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

Filet minion

"Any of you guys feel like hot dogs?"

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

"Five hamburgers with buns, three hamburgers without buns and two buns, without hamburgers."

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

'Your fancy new grill works great. . .and we didn't even have to turn it on.'

"Isn't it great to get out of the kitchen and cook in the fresh air!"

Barbecued dessert, anyone? The coals are PERFECT now!

His New Grillfriend

'Burl says it only works with corn though if you want to try it.'

Ode to a Grill

"Okay - who wants theirs well done?"

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

"You like yours well done, right?"

Burnt or Raw?

Moses uses the burning bush to roast a kosher frank

"They make an awfully big thing of cookouts."

"Dad's barbeucuing again so Mom's got the pizza place on speed dial."