Cooking School Student Gifts

"Cooking Tip # 23: If at first you don't succeed, feed it to the cat."

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

"You're the lid to my pot."

6 Brothers Falafel

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

Cookbooks

"Rump roast?"

Picking pastries.

'He's trying to put some magic into my recipes.'

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

Peter Pan, the Utensil that Never Grew Up

"How fresh is the calamari?"

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

"'TSP' stands for 'teaspoon' not 'two solid pounds'!"

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

"Our cook is new, so ge's Googling what goes on a bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich as we speak."

"And how is last week's tilapia tonight?"

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

"We have; pulled pork, enticed chicken, persuaded lamb, bullied beef, cajoled Turkey..."

'Thank you so much, but I just followed the directions in the cookbook.'

"These things are delicious. Hard and crunchy on the outside, soft and chewy on the inside!"

"The soup of the day is pineapple with a hint of rum."

"I hope we can sell everything before it's time for mom to make dinner."

"Waiter, there's a hare in my salad!"

Man's cooking explodes.

Congratulations, dear! Your home cooked dinner was so good you'd think it was an expensive frozen entree!

“Our numbers grow greater and greater. Soon the era of the spices will be at hand”