Cooking Instructor Gifts

Radiator Cookery

A chef teaches a classroom of other chefs how to properly flip something using a spatula.

'Maybe we shouldn't show how sausage and foie gras are made on the same day.'

"The problem with those cooking shows is they don't tell you how to turn on your oven."

"On. More. Try."

"In all my years of teaching I've never seen pizza dough spun into a triangle!"

"Remember, never put all your eggs into one omelet."

'That's right, my dog DID eat my homework.'

'Preparing rocket salad isn't domestic science, ladies.'

'Read it and weep!'

'Leave us alone, you big bully!'

"I've made my new spaghetti dish."

A School for Cooks.

"First you make a roux."

"'TSP' stands for 'teaspoon' not 'two solid pounds'!"

"Well, that gut has the cool hat, but the other guy is actually cooking."

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

Come dine with me!

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

"First cook the cake, then apply icing sugar and candles..."

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

"I'm so proud - she's already learning her shapes."

"You're lost. This is Mom's apple pie."

"It's the sequel to 'Cooking for One'."

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

"Mom, does the Russian borscht you made for dinner give me foreign-policy experience?"

"All the butter was gone. There was no way out. The puff pastry had to be made with margarine... from a tub."

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

How to Deal With Leftover Turkey

"Do you remember when we used to put FOOD in food?"

Chef uses Harp to cut Sausages

'Mary had a little lamb - with mint jelly.'

"When I was young, we personally prepared all the food for each and every meal!"

'It's all homemade.'