Cookie Season Gifts

"We don't want any cookies. Go away."

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

Gracie goes to get cookies for Santa, but Papi has eaten them all.

"Jill Hamster's entrepreneurial disaster"

"How is it that someone who reads all the Harry Potter books still doesn't know the magic word?"

"I can't give you a prescription for milk and cookies."

'I'm going to make a batch of my ginger biscuits.'

'Works every time.'

"Oh boy! Mom made microchip cookies!"

'Dial 1-900-Fortune.'

"Bad things happen to people who don't buy my cookies, Sir."

Do you have any cookies you aren't using?

"Sis, my teacher said to list the four food groups. . . but I can only think of three. Cookies, candy and ice cream!"

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

'Mom's baking finally allowed us to diversify and greatly increase our neighborhood market share.'

"You have a co-pay...two cookies and a glass of milk."

'This fortune cookie says 'buy oriental tea futures'...'

"Let's just say the chocolate chip cookie diet isn't working."

The Gingerbread Man Hits 50.

'It'll never work. I'm reading 'Of Mice And men' and you haven't even gotten through 'If You Give A Mouse A Cookie,.'

"Whoa. There's a huge crack down here." "Tell me about it."

"It's our most popular gift - a helium cookie."

Miracle Mom #5,293

"Mom said eat everything in moderation, so I renamed the cookie jar 'Moderation.'"

'I don't think I've ever heard of the Geezer Scouts or Geezer Scout cookies.'

Cookie Surveillance

"I like to use new Bible words. Let's beseech Mom for cookies."

"Roadkill cookies"

Instant Gratification Cafe.

' I let you think it's your ides...then I agree with you.'

"I was going to share my cookies with teddy, but he's on a diet....so I had to eat them all."

Santa looking at a plate of cookies and a bottle of hand sanitizer

"First Big Oil, the Big Steel, and now, Big Cookie."