Cookie Culprit Gifts

The first temptation of Christ.

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

"Ninja bread men"

"Oh boy! Mom made microchip cookies!"

'Dial 1-900-Fortune.'

"Sis, my teacher said to list the four food groups. . . but I can only think of three. Cookies, candy and ice cream!"

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

Mr Claus, tests indicate your blood is 95% milk and cookies.

"When I gave up cookies for the period of fasting called Lent, I thought it would be an hour, like the period of school called math."

' I let you think it's your ides...then I agree with you.'

Instant Gratification Cafe.

"First Big Oil, the Big Steel, and now, Big Cookie."

"I think he said he wants to buy 'just the one'. You'd better fetch the manager"

'Mom, was it one or two cps of sugar?'

'There really IS a Santa!' Santa busts pets eating his milk and cookies

"But I'm conducting an experiment: will the twentieth cookie taste as good as the first?"

"I said hot, boiling oil! Not cold, refreshing milk!"

Girl Scout cookies selling the girl scout.

"Ask Mom for Sweet Chunk Cookies. If she says no, ask Grandma."

A complimentary biscuit

"I don't really think you're cut out for this job..."

If you give a mouse a French cookie: "And suddenly the memory returns. The taste was that of the little crumb of madeleine which on Sunday mornings at..."

'Santa, don't believe him. He's the one who ate the cookies and milk last year.'

'The doctor said my body is 40% fat. These cookies are only 20% fat. That's got to help.'

"So which one of you pesky dogs stole the last cookie from the bottom of the jar?"

"Oh, there will be an investigation!"

"The cookies are always stale."

"I'm your surrogate mother, son. I just provided the oven."

"Whosoever pulleth this sword from this stone, and can eat just two or three of these double-chocolate Amaretto things without finishing the whole box, shall be king born of England!"

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