Cookie Bandit Gifts

'I've had a lot of experience at this. My Mom keeps the cookie jar on top of the refrigerator.'

"Wait, this seems way too easy!"

The arrival of girl scout cookies sparks a rise in black bear activity...

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

"How is it that someone who reads all the Harry Potter books still doesn't know the magic word?"

"Ninja bread men"

'Works every time.'

"5 chocolate brownies, 3 banana muffins, 4 caramel cookies and one cappuccino - skinny."

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

Mother to son, regarding stolen cake: 'I don't need to check anything with 'the boys in forensics' I know it was you.'

Mr Claus, tests indicate your blood is 95% milk and cookies.

Cookie Surveillance

"When I gave up cookies for the period of fasting called Lent, I thought it would be an hour, like the period of school called math."

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"I think he said he wants to buy 'just the one'. You'd better fetch the manager"

"But I'm conducting an experiment: will the twentieth cookie taste as good as the first?"

"O.K., one last big rhubarb score. But then I'm out of the pie game for good."

'Well, they're just like your mom's cookies if your mom is a 35 ton, multi-unit dough extruder.'

"I said hot, boiling oil! Not cold, refreshing milk!"

"Oh, there will be an investigation!"

'Santa, don't believe him. He's the one who ate the cookies and milk last year.'

"So which one of you pesky dogs stole the last cookie from the bottom of the jar?"

"I don't care what your father said, Santa likes milk and cookies NOT beer and pretzels!"

'Because it's there!'

It had been a good life, filled with passion and joy, tender bonds, and finally one irretrievable error.

Cookie Thief

Mom's House O' Chili.

Dunking biscuits in the bosses tea.

'Okay, okay. On second thought, maybe going on a diet isn't necessary.'

"For God's sake, Michelangelo, it's just a cookie!"

Dr. Frankenstein: 'Heyyyy, What THE...?!'

Animal Crackers. Free-range animal crackers.

Unpopular Christmas cookie shapes

He's Tasty!