Conversation King Pillows

Before the airbag, there was the windbag.

'Every time you get ready to make a call, on your mobile phone, you reach for a comfortable chair. No wonder all that air time translates into large phone bills.'

"She can be outspoken."

Chatterbox Podium

Man with landline phone coming out of his head.

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

"She's in a conversationally induced coma."

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

"Matthew, did we agree to adopt a whale?"

'Why do they call him Neckline Ned.' - 'He's always plunging down the middle but never showing anything.'

"I know. I miss him, too."

"Liife! Give my conversation Liife!"

"At least you don’t need a wetsuit."

"Every single day, guys ask you for advice about women, work, sports... Haven't you ever even heard of the law of supply and demand?. . .I'd be glad to steer the downtrodden and the forlorn your way for a mere 82% of the man-to-man-talk fee."

"Another organization has already researched this, but I'm afraid that if we use it, we won't get as much credit."

"I always know what Harry's going to say, and he always knows what I'm going to say, so, by and large, we just don't bother."

Bar Therapy

The Art of Bantering!

'Your 40th? Well maybe if you're talking about the number of cans you've had!'

'Hold on, there might be someone more interesting on the other line...'

"Are you busy or are you at work?"

Man swipes friend's drink, saying: 'Thanks Dave, I'll have what you're having.'

"This conversation is being performed in front of a live audience."

'Why so stony-faced?'

"How did I get to be the only one that listens?"

'Yes, I laugh at most things, but it doesn't mean I can't have a serious conversation...'

'Mind you, this isn't a secret I'd tell just everybody.'

'Do you think we need more conversation in our relationship?'

Come to think of it...I owe all my drive, focus and ambition to credit card debt.

"Watch out for Bernie...he's a man of few words but a lot of gestures."

'Let's go some place where we can walk.'

"If I had my life to live over again, I'd unlearn macrame."

Lady praises date for being a good conversationalist.

"My super powers are listening and downsizing my life."