Conversation Aficionados T-Shirts

Twice a year, Uncle Mort and Sadie Cohen have an official relationship talk. While this biannual conversation is scheduled by mutual consent under long-standing treaty, some participants engage grudgingly. Let's talk about our feelings. I don't feel like it. That's not a feeling, Snookums! Loophole!

'I have it! - - We'll call this our Chat Room!'

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

"Could I ask just one question?"

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

Changing Minds

"Who knew we had so many dislikes in common?"

Men gossiping

Protest

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

" I'm sorry. I was so busy listening to myself talk that I forgot what I was saying."

"Isn't us talking about how I would never take a ballroom dancing class an activity we're doing together?"

Counselor. It's annoying that he always has to have the second-to-last word

"No, no, that’s in a bar, Mr. President — you can talk politics and religion here."

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."

Quentin Tarantino

"I should warn you that many of John's thoughts are subliminal."

"Nope! He'd never set eyes on a water cooler in all his years in the office!"

"I like them. They hate the same things we do."

"I'm just so relieved! I thought you didn't love me anymore, but now I realize I was just projecting!!"

"I'm not really into organized religion, though I am very spiritual."

Attention Span Man

"I don't like the tone of your voice. Mind if I tweak it a bit?"

Big Talk/Small Talk.

'When did they start giving Pulitzers for texting?'

Pie chart of pub conversations

'I leave a few spaces so you can get a few words in edgeways.'

'No, he didn't have any last words,his wife was in there and she did all of the talking right up to the end.'

"I used to waste a lot of time explaining myself to family, friends and shrinks. Now I only explain myself to Rick."

Can I ask you a question, man-to-man? Sure, little buddy. What do "man-to-man talks" usually consist of? What? I've never really had one, I don't think. What usually goes into them? Sports? Shaving? Carburetors? A little of this, a little of that. There's a proper ratio, of course. I'm not good at math.

White Wine Wisdom (2)

"We should probably talk about the elephant in the Roomba."

"I said, you know why women talk more than men?" "What?" "I said, you know why women talk more than men..." "What?"

"What on earth do they find to talk about?"

'What do you mean I've wolfed that down? You've never stopped nattering!'