Conversation Aficionado Gifts

Don

"Tell me, do you ever shut up?"

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

"Where would you see yourself in five years' time?"

"Could I ask just one question?"

PERSONNEL, 'Why did you leave your previous employment?', 'They asked too many questions!'

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

"Who knew we had so many dislikes in common?"

Men gossiping

"Allow me to respond to your question with a question of my own that I can answer."

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

" I'm sorry. I was so busy listening to myself talk that I forgot what I was saying."

'I was just beginning to think about my portfolio. Now you're telling me to rethink it.'

"Isn't us talking about how I would never take a ballroom dancing class an activity we're doing together?"

'We finally learned to communicate, and he's worse than I thought he was!

Quentin Tarantino

'It's a difficult position to fill. Someone who's smarter than me - and smart enough to pretend not to know it.'

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."

"No, no, that’s in a bar, Mr. President — you can talk politics and religion here."

Counselor. It's annoying that he always has to have the second-to-last word

"I should warn you that many of John's thoughts are subliminal."

'Sir, you inaugural speech is simply wonderful. I would just suggest you say 'dear employees' instead of 'hey, you bunch of lousy slaves'.'

Twice a year, Uncle Mort and Sadie Cohen have an official relationship talk. While this biannual conversation is scheduled by mutual consent under long-standing treaty, some participants engage grudgingly. Let's talk about our feelings. I don't feel like it. That's not a feeling, Snookums! Loophole!

"Nope! He'd never set eyes on a water cooler in all his years in the office!"

"I like them. They hate the same things we do."

"Do your thing, Phil...lull them into submission."

"I'm not really into organized religion, though I am very spiritual."

'Vote for me because my Super PAC raised lots more money than my opponent's Super PAC.'

"I'm just so relieved! I thought you didn't love me anymore, but now I realize I was just projecting!!"

You Don't Have To Be Crazy To Work Here But You Will Be After The Training.

Complaints departement for men and women.

'If I got the job as a sales manager here at Zenadine, I would probably straggle in around 10, then surf the Net for a while, do a crossword...'

"OK Hunter. Go join the 'non-verbal criticism skills' seminar!"

Attention Span Man

"When you put it like that, it makes complete sense."