Convenience Dining Aficionado Gifts

Eating this way really fits my busy lifestyle...one-stop slopping!

'I sent out for everything.'

LAY ZEE FUK

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

'Do you realize that we're sitting in a prefabricated house, eating precooked dinners, and listening to Chris Matthews' opinions?'

"We'd better stock up on TV snacks in the event of war."

I love Cannelloni

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

''Food miles' is a big issue, so I'm reducing the distance my food travels by moving my fridge into the living room.'

The Complete Spaghetti Dinner.

"You've ordered comfort food. May I recommend a comfort wine?"

Pop Top Ice FIshing

A dozen predictions for foods of the future.

Shopper in grocery store sees TV dinners marked daytime and prime time.

"And finally the chef's surprise - the check!"

TV Chef Cooking Range

"I know it's our first date and we're at this fancy restaurant and all, but would it be a red flag if I ordered the chicken fingers?"

"I like Casual Dining, but this is too casual. I ordered spaghetti!"

"Mmm, processed food. Just like mom used to microwave."

'To her...the basic 4 food groups are canned, frozen, fast and delivered.'

"... with a side of brown rice, right. And can the delivery guy stop at the pharmacy and pick up my prescription?"

Fini. That show was schmaltzy, way too sentimental. I'll never criticize anything that can be described as "cheesy"!

'...and the property comes with a fully fitted kitchen'

Soup

What's really in junk food...

Cook for 3 minutes stir, wait 30 years to discover if the contaminated ingredient gives you stomach cancer.

Church Drive-Thru.

"By the time I've read all the nutrition and ingredients information I've lost my appetite!"

TV Dinners, Now in High Definition.

"If it says to add water, and I'm the one who adds it, I'm cooking."

Uptight Fishing...'we put the bait on for you'

To her, the four basic food groups are canned, frozen, fast and delivered.

"We can never get them both to work at the same time."

'What are the three basic food groups?'

To avoid malnutrition, throw away the contents and eat the package.