Controversy Examiner T-Shirts

"You're fired."

'You may now turn over your paper and begin.' - 'Sir!' - 'Yes?' - 'What is it?' - 'I think Train 'A' and Train 'B' might be going to crash!'

"It's Dr. Sadie. Go ahead, caller." "Yeah, how come you haven't said 'Merry Christmas' yet?" "Oh, that’s because I was hoping to provoke everyone who’s upset about the so-called 'war on Christmas' to spend all their time on hold waiting to castigate me. That way, all the normal people who don’t think Christmas is just another chance to play the victim can open their gifts in peace." "You're welcome, America." "Why haven't you played 'Jingle Bells' yet?"

Trivia Night in Apartment 8-G

Lion Tamers School - Lion licking his lips examiner marking a fail

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

'Thank you for not guessing.'

"Office of quality assurance"

Examiners.

'He's a real stickler for punctuality. He got really annoyed when I was late for an appointment, next week.'

Assault weapons go over the cliff.

"Here's my wallet, my phone, the key to the safe and an application form for your so-called 'mind control device.'"

Lambs to the Slaughter

Man tapping a tuning fork on another man's knee

Patent Office: ". . . It's a phoneless cord."

"Smart Arse"

I don't know if neuronal stem cells can or cannot become blood cells but one thing is for sure, neuronal stem cells can become controversial.

Sunset

Barrister asking a witness to produce burnt papers

"I pride myself on being able to walk that fine line between misdemeanor and felony."

"Bob, you've been warned before. You can't come to prayer just to gather gossip material."

"And for a left-handed designated hitter and a player to be named later, Mr. Steinbrenner would gladly fly Elián home."

"Some people say you can't put a price on a wife's twenty-seven years of loyalty and devotion. They're wrong."

'Quit if you want, Bowman, but the intellectual property stays here.'

'I knew it! Important Exclusion 347, 'Plummeting Pachyderms'. . .'

'Exhibit A: the oxygen tube that came loose the night she died. You were there that night. You wanted to play then, too.'

'Your two o'clock cheeseseeking missle is here.'

"I thought SAT was 'Smart Alec Teacher'!"

'As it turned out, circumstantial evidence was all they needed.'

"Well, certainly his claim seems justified , but if we paid off every justified claim what kind of insurance company would we be?"

'...no you can't phone a friend!'

"You know how I feel about sampling!"

'He's just failed my husband. Bring the examiner out here immediately!'