Controller Captain T-Shirts

'Video games don't seem to have done my dad any harm.'

Sometimes I wish I were a character in a video game. What? Why? Because they can run for miles, jump, tumble, spin, kick and punch, and never get out of breath. I can't run more than 100 feet without getting winded

Police Marksman Game

'That seating section is for video gamers only.'

Rage.

Captain in a storm

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

For some reason, "The Road Less Travelled" GPS package never really caught on...

Homo Gamus

A massive ship pulls in in Central Park.

Captain steering house through flood.

'It's my company, I'll decide whether I want to go to the partner's meeting or not.'

'Well, it wasn't my lucky day... first there was that shark and then I bimped into a bunch of beaver!'

"Sorry, Rick, but no thongs means no thongs."

'If we get out of this alive, I'm going to have a darn good look at your resume.'

"Next time be more careful where you put the decimal point!"

Welsh airport arrivals.

STRIP Hambone: Sucidal computer over company balance sheets

Sea weed harvest.

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

Lighthouse Beam.

'Not while I'm driving the boat, Marge, please,'

'I like to greet the new team members myself.'

"The boys at Jack's Bait & Tackle will never believe this one!"

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

Frontispiece to 'Dombey and Son'

Lifesaver!

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

"The Captain really, really hates losing at shuffleboard."

Internet Cafe.

'These new video games are getting out of hand...'

Ship upsidedown in a bottle has rescue boat in bottle next to it.

"Awwwk! Mutiny is a go! Pass it on! Awwk!"

"There's always a period of adjustment whenever you hire a new crew."

It became increasingly difficult for the captain to reward his crew and still maintain his ferocious reputation.