Contrast Comedian T-Shirts

"Do you have anything fit for a King?"

Every class has one. . .

"Let's play make-believe. I'll diagnose you with a life-threatening illness, then cure you with a wonder-drug that turns out to be a placebo."

'Who stuck corks on all the cursors?'

"Three more classes and I get my belt."

'If they don't laugh, we'll say it's art.'

"Not to quibble, Helen, but if you look up 'Pathetic Loser' in the dictionary I don't believe anyone's picture is there."

Monet At Open Mic Night

"I would have thought you'd be pleased."

Keister Island

Two friars ringing bells

'How'd the negotiations go? Take a wild guess.'

'I'll pay double for half as much.'

Ye Olde FIgure-Drawing Classe

'Thanks to Obama the Nobel Prize has lost much of its prestige. This is the third time I got one in my surprise meal this week.'

'You paint abstract, why do I need to be nude?'

'I have a very neat desk but a very messy computer desktop.'

'Knee him in the groin - it always works.'

Bad vibes next 3 miles.

"Being vague and general?" "No, that's the first law of psychics, I want the law of phsics."

"I'm hoping that once we enter the Bronze Age I'll be able to get a better likeness of you."

'I do wish you would stop asking for change back when they pass the plate.'

"... a 24 hour mimosa bar, and a 'free love' dating policy! Anyway, how's it been going for you?"

'I told you that 'will of the people' stuff would backfire!'

I am NOT a serial killer...

Self help tape - listening skills

"I'm not sure that lifting the remote control is what they meant by 'taking exercise'!"

Scavenenger's hunt.

'You said you wanted to experiment in bed.'

Eggskimos: Eskimos in the form of Eggs.

'Goodbye Sam. Goodbye Abby. A special goodbye to you, Eddie.'

The End IS Near

The Stone in the Peach