Contrast Admirer Gifts

One star.

The Greeting Card and the Business Letter

"Why does this curious plant of his always make me feel gigantic?"

Closet.

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

"To be honest, I don't believe in ghosts."

"We'll destroy it to the ground ... ...and then..."

bird interprets modern art

Clever visual metaphor used to personify the abstract concept of thought and memory.

Look At Me I'm Still Wearing Shorts.

An old-time engineer enters the cockpit on a flight.

'You gonna finish that lemon peel?'

A bird that is also the helmet from a suit of armour (or is it a bird inside a helmet?). Notice the very small flying bird/helmet in the background.

"Big n' tall" "Small n' long"

"I'll give you $5 for that shirt."

First Prize!

Jackson Pollock Signs A Rent Check

'I agree, this artist will go far and he should start right now!'

Prisoner still life painting.

"It's a great work!"

"We have a favor to ask."

"I like it, Julian — it speaks to what a waste of time and money your MFA was."

'Picasso'

"Here the artist opted for a more impressionistic approach, because drawing a tree is hard."

"An overload -- even this is beginning to look like Kitsch."

The Formal Street Artist

'The artist did this one during his 'I've got no idea' - period.'

Knight with paint tin on his head.

'Sorry, but I think your Mondrian tattoo was a mistake.'

'Why, yes madam, these are my paintings. How did you know?'

Alligator Bars

Landscape Artists

"To me..It says Art Council crap regional funding"

"I don't pretend to be great. I merely know myself to be very, very good."

'What are they worth? Well, it's difficult to put a price on such extraordinary works of art. How much you got?'