Contract Chameleon T-Shirts

And this is Jim, one of our old hands - he's been here well before lunch!

"Where would you see yourself in five years' time?"

'That's Oog -- he got a haircut and a job.'

"I see you're an ex televangelist who would like to stay in sales."

'You must be the only 'Jack-of-all-trades' who is out of work in all of them!'

"Ambitions... to make a career change from tourism to sales."

Farmer's Market.

"Charlie Greider... that rascal! I had a sneaking suspicion he'd be shedding his skin and moving on to a bigger company before too long!"

'So when the bottom fell out of sheep shearing I had to find something else...'

The contract was not worth the paper it was written on, which considering the paper was not a good sign.

"Can you go through all the old pitch decks and replace the word 'crypto' with 'AI'?"

"I've got a great idea! By adding the words "and associates" to my business name, no one will every suspect I'm really just one person with a phone and a web site working out of my bedroom!"

'Reinvent yourself, and get back to us.'

'We don't have anyone here by that name. Was he perhaps using one of his aliases?'

"I've been an accountant, an actuary, an advertising exec, an administrator, an architect, an art director, and an auditor, and now I'd like to move on to the B's."

"He retired as an executive, returned as a contractor, became a consultant and now he's a brooding presence."

I'm filling out my myface.com and I have a question. Rudy Park, tech genius, at your service. Should I pretend to be 10,12 or 26 years old? 32? I configure browsers, not fake personas! I think I'll play for the Broncos.

"On your application it says you've been a circus clown, an orthopaedic surgeon and a molecular biologist."

"Your resume shows you have had numerous jobs and in all of them you were rather invisible."

Corporate Lawyers

'What do I do for a living?? Isn't it obvious?'

'We may be bankrupt, but we're not broke.'

'You're a model - what sort, dear?'

'Please hold any incoming personal calls for me. I need to disappear into character for a while!'

'After 30 years around here, Jenkins has the ability to assume the tones and textures of his environment.'

'Actually I started out in quantum mechanics, but somewhere along the way I took a wrong turn.'

"I'm ready. Are you ready? Let the billing begin!"

'On the internet, nobody knows you're a monkey.'

"Please, Dianna, at least give me a chance to rebrand myself."

"Start Monday...I like the cut of your jib, young man"

'Millers said they travelled through Europe? Nonsense! All of their souvenirs have little tags reading 'Made in China'!'

'Are you having this identity crisis because you current identity sucks?'

"Tell me again, Dad, how you started in the mailroom."

"Yes, many of us have had life changes since you switched focus to Environmental Law."

"We're offering twenty million plus incentives over a four-year period, Mrs. Morton. Can Timmy come out and play?"