Contest Connoisseur T-Shirts

Last Place in Swimming Contest

The First Annual Game Show Week.

"The good news is you've won a date with a sexy film star, the bad news is..."

Your big moment on Altra Gameshow

Donut Eating Contest

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

"You call this a constitution?"

"He's an abstract artist."

Sundar Pichai's first doodle.

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

"Did you ask the client about product placement?"

'Billy! Set your homework aside and get down here. There's another basketball recruiter here to see you.'

"It's called 'Sold'."

'I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

"Who's the artist?"

"I was really impressed by the way you sent back the wine, though it did come in second to the waiter's uppercut."

"I can't wait to see our new ad campaign. Wait, don't tell me...it's NEW and IMPROVED!"

"Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!"

"I would never do a nude scene, unless the part really called for it."

'It's really nice up here, but I miss all the negative political ads.'

Nicola Sturgeon

VOTE, 'I'll never lie to you, but I'll use a lot of euphemisms!'

"Don't rush me, I've got to get it right!"

'The contest brought in only twenty two wrappers...'

"If there's anything we can do to make your stay more pleasant, just rant about it all over the Internet."

"That's a nice little book. It didn't waste too much of my time."

"Mind if we play through?"

"What kind of moviemaking do we want to reinforce?"

Anthony Kennedy