Contest Competitors T-Shirts

These guys are going to have some kind of contest. (Musical note.) Let's see who sings the best. (Question mark.) No. Let's play "Jeopardy." All answers must be in the form of a question. (Exclamation point.) Whatever we do, I'll be the most enthusiastic!! (Ampersand.) Can we form partnerships? (Dollar sign.) Is there any prize money? (Percentage symbol.) What are the chances of winning? (Asterisk.) Winning's not that important. With me here, winning will be marked as not wholly

Due to his low center of gravity, Jake is the greatesr broncbuster ever!

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

The First Annual Game Show Week.

'It's the same everywhere: body over brains.'

'Henderson always walks away with the neighborhood pumpkin carving contest.'

High Five

'The employee who guesses closest to the correct number of beans in this jar will be awarded this year's annual pay increase! -Management, ATOZ Accountants

'Rhea of the Year.'

Elf of the Month

Loser's Podium.

'Are you the proud parents of our (drumming contest) winner?'

'Congratulations. You're our 15th caller. The grant is yours!'

'The contest brought in only twenty two wrappers...'

'We did it, Dad! We won the heaviest frog award!'

Man reading letter, 'You may already be a winner' about to step on rake.

I must say, that's the most pathetic bar promotion I've ever seen. Tuesdays! Wet Socks Contest!

"Sure I won the spelling bee contest, but since everyone has spell check, no one cares!"

Contest time. Mort and Sadie, our ornery octogenarians, have decided to rename Rudy's generation. Mort favors Generation I - for impatient. Sadie prefers Generation V - for virtual. Or vapid! What do you think? Please send your own ideas to asksadieshow@gmail.com. C'mon people, get thinkin'!

'I'm doing a 'Win a Date with a Computer Geek' contest on my website.'

No soliciting - unless you're one of those sweepstakes

'You are the unwisest man...goodbye.'

'We've won a free trip to the mountains.'

'You're excited about winning a traveling toothbrush kit in a sweepstakes after spending $300 on postage and entering 1,500 contests?'

'Could you help me on my grunting.'

Too-Humble Pie.

"I'd love to chat, Al, but I've got to hit the road."

Rudy, you wanna know possible names for your generation? Huh? The L-Generation for loser, the C-generation for clueless or connected, J for jerk or W for whiners. These readers suggestions all have something in common. None of them won the contest to name Rudy's generation. Not that we're taunting the non-winners. C'mon, taunt the losers!! Winner to be named any day now.

Redneck Wet T-shirt Contest

'1000 pies to eat before you die.'

We're stuck here for the entire summer. It's loserville! Let's start "the most boring town" contest. I bet there's one already on the web. Darn! Here's a "top ten tedious towns" list. We're not on it. West Fester is so boring, it's not even the most boring.

Maybe we should do a big check next time. Sweepstak … 5 five.

Sorry you are not a winner please try again

Angel Wins Publisher's Clearing House

Good Luck