Consumer Experience Commentator Prints

Consumer Complaints.

'The recession is over, again.'

Sign Reform

"Consumer confidence remains high as long as we keep them distracted buying stuff."

"Consumer confidence remains high as long as we keep them distracted buying stuff."

"Your mom's not protesting sex and violence on TV...she's taking a stand against those early Christmas ads..."

'The customers' suggestions make a lot of sense. I say, let's hire the customers and fire the staff!'

'Stocks gyrated today on news life is full of suprises.'

The economy doctor

"This conversation may be recorded for training purposes, depending on how well we confuse you."

"Before you speak to the manager, we want to congratulate you on being our one millionth irate customer."

Mall Ahead - Be prepared to shop.

'No, we don't take complaints, we SELL complaints.. If the sign said POPCORN, you wouldn't try to GIVE me popcorn, would you?'

'You've been friendly to a customer? You anwered his question competently and solved his problem?? Don't you dare to do that again, mister!!'

Visit Santa today...sponsored by Acme Razor Company

'Sir, our new automated telephone system saves us $20,000 annually, but our phone business has dropped 66%!'

Sharings,,,formerly complaints,

"He's a genius at product placement."

For the new gardener.

"Now, I wonder whether you'd be kind enough to complete our customer feedback survey?"

How America Was Re-Won

Heart vending machine.

Invent Sales Day

"I can't take the job in customer relations. I hate the customers. How can I possibly deal with their relatives?"

'After nine commercials I've forgotten what film we were watching.'

Welcome to Stupidity Night, Pay Full Price and Get In Free.

'Anyone can sell. It's keeping it sold that's the art.'

"The customer is always right....the customer is ALWAYS right..."

Art Gallery

"Thank YOU Amazon!"

Friendly bank/Formal bank.

"Just how fed up with customer services feedback are you: (a) very (b) extremely (c) incandescent with rage (d) don't ask if you value your life?"

'You can contact us 3 ways: an email that will be trashed, a fax that will be buried, and a letter which will be lost.'

"This dining set can be yours with no payments until next year, at which point we charge you double and dump you in boiling oil!

"I can't see the POINT of all this emphasis on 'customer care'!"