Construction Comedy Fan Gifts

"And nobody noticed the crease in the blueprint?"

'Have you seen that new safety inspector anywhere lately?'

'The builder is behind schedule but my lease was up at my previous location.'

Zero to sixty in two seconds.

Scaffolding team watching TV.

'Ooops. Wonder if I can claim El Nino caused a surge in water pressure?'

'Smyrka, you'll wait in the pay line just like these guys.'

"Haha...check out the typo on this head office memo. They're sending an elven safety officer out to inspect the site."

Builder follows an architect's blueprints exactly, including the smudges.

'I don't want to be a nuisance, you can shoot me if it's more convenient.'

'Please Pardon the Inconvenience as we Remodel the ER.'

'I guess there was a typo on the job order. It was supposed to read 'mow the lawn, not plow the lawn.''

'And when did it dawn on you that the people building your extension were just a bunch of cowboys?'

Builder mistakes snail for measuring tape.

'If you sing 'If I Had a Hammer' one more time, I'm going to hit you with one.'

Alien Builder.

Fearing insurance rate increases if he had another accident claim, Dave tries a new harness system.

None of the piercings hurt except the forehead bolts - I got those by accident at my construction job. Detroit Pencil Company.

Construction workers building a library are all saying, 'shhh, shhh' to each other.

'The electricians hot-wired the building inspector's car seat again.'

NASA realized too late that there was intelligent life on this newly discovered planet.

Earth Moving A Specialty

Builders build a property that has a crease in it like the design plan.

Cowboy builders

Mr. Briggs' Pleasures of Housekeeping, part 6

"We could have been here sooner, but we wanted to wait until the beautiful Yellow Brick Road was built."

'No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants.'

'Masonry robot, what are you doing?'

Lumber Yard. Luxury Homes! Some Assembly Required.

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

'The hard hats? In case of falling interest rates.'

'My analysis indicates the need for an asbestos-ectomy, electrical-graphs and a plumbing-bypass.'

'Still workin' on the beard, Jerry?'

"Frosty the Repairman"

Building a better America - Financing by The Bank of China.