Considering Plastic Surgery Pillows

Plastic surgeon's waiting room.

"But doctor...when I said I wanted to increase my breasts what I meant was..."

"When I actually was this age, I didn't have much facial expression anyway."

Doctor describes inside guts while patient has black thoughts.

'I did have a tummy-tuck...But I opted for reconstruction surgery at the same time.'

'Despite his laser eye surgery, he still doesn't see the mess he leaves in the living room every day.'

"If they do let anyone go I don't think age will be a consideration. You shouldn't kill yourself trying to look younger than you are."

'Of course she hasn't aged a bit. She's married to a plastic surgeon!'

Facelift Book.

"Botox."

'You do Botox?'

"It's too late for a nose job and too early for a face-lift."

'You know what'll do wonders for you? A nose job.'

'You'll be awake during the entire procedure...but no peeking!'

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

'The surgery is expensive. We'll have to numb you from the wallet down.'

"When Butcher Bob gets back from lunch this one is getting a vasectomy."

Dr. and Mrs. Steven Mueller.

Mirror mirror...

'Will the surgery leave a scar?'

"I'm thinking considerably longer. How about you, Alan?"

'I know we're all terrified of malpractice suits, Bob, but as plastic surgeons, I think we can do a little more than just 'style his hair and call it a day.''hair

'Ahhh . . . he's got your original nose.'

'Crikey, you've got to have good eye-sight to look through those glasses, haven't you?'

"Oh no, Doris. . . not implants!"

'I'm thinking about laser eye surgery.'

'There was no more putting it off; breast reduction time.'

Botox sharpei

At the office of Dr. Picasso, Plastic Surgeon

"I picked this one up in France while my wife had her hip replaced."

'After having the botox injections in my lips I can handle really hot coffee.'

"I'm going to have to make this quick, God. I just ask that you watch over me during my double knee replacement tomorrow."

Woman leaves cosmetic surgery as her waste skin is dumped in skip.

"All these years I put my nose to the grindstone. Now I need a nose job!"

'Voila!! No more wrinkles!!'