Conscience Humor Lover Pillows

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

'I've got no problem with December, but what do I blog about the rest of the year?'

"Oooh, I know what I want to be when I grow up: Retired!"

"I'd have been here sooner if it hadn't been for early detection."

'Right now I'm counting the blessings that we owe to Uncle Sam.'

'Something needs to be done about the surgery room lights.'

Safe driver.

"Bless me father for I have allegedly sinned."

'Talking about Jesus is NOT name-dropping!'

'Don't be too hard on sinners. If it weren't for sinning, we'd all be out of work!'

"T.G.I.F."

Religious toilets.

'In conclusion, it's more blessed to give than retrieve.'

"Not sure that's the graven image of Baal we were looking for."

"I know I've matured because I choose to purchase my own candy instead of stealing my children's."

"According to your EKG, you are not a good hearted person."

Giving thanks.

'So? -- What could be more Zen than empty calories?'

'If we do meet again in the after-life, you don't know me, o.k.?'

"Wisdom is growing your hair long so the hairs growing in your ears don't show

Church Spire

Flo's Christmas Lights: 'I really like what you've done with yawr Christmas lights this yeaw Flo.'

'Nobody's leaving till I get the offering plate back!'

'Hey! You! Yes, You! I read in a yoga book that I, too, am God... So watch it!'

"They hold up my halo!"

'I was an overachiever.'

The wages of sin is death! 'Boy, sinners must have a TERRIBLE union!'

"Yin and Seymour"

Cut out and keep your own Jesus.

'How about giving me your phone number?. . . But I don't know your name.'

'Can I be someone else's Guardian Angel? The guy's a bleeder.'

"He thinks Christianity is performance based."