Connoisseur Of Satire Gifts

"It says here that the inspiration for this piece was the gallery...they told him to stop sitting around in bars sipping red wine and do his bloody job!"

The Berlin Peace Movement

Beckett for Beginners: "Waiting for Thumbkin"

"Call security, Miss Rightman. I have an overwhelming urge to throw good money after bad"

Totalitarian Humour

Bureaucracy gone mad!

'Probably giving evidence at some sort of industrial tribunal....heh!'

"In a just world we'd have 'No Lawyer Left Behind'."

'Upon further review, the pig did not have control of the ball prior to being eaten...'

'... But, wouldn't that be kind of like, cannibalism?'

'This year, Sire, I've created a socko narrative of scatological raillery and rollicking nihilism which ends with a sexy justification for third quarter losses.'

"I hate weddings. They make me feel a momentary lapse of cynicism."

The Modern Damocles -

The Unknown Philosopher, who first realised life is no picnic.

ENNUI...(smiley face).

"My bouche was not amused."

"Maybe I will and maybe I won't - You're not prejudiced against transvestites, are you?"

Mo's USA Bar: Tips/Tariffs

The Mafia Goes Green.

Bureau of Missing Door Knobs

The Milbrook Verney chair in literature. The C.K. Frebish endowment for footnotes.

Our Mission: "Who are we trying to kid? It's just one day at a time around here!"

Well done, Harris. That's one of the straightest paperclips I've ever seen.

'Actually, I find the destroying more satisfying than the nation-building.'

"I'm told the omelettes here have a broader purpose."

Art Vandalism

Please do not give insider tips to the bears.

'You're trying to find yourself? -- No offense, but if I were you, I'd look for somebody ELSE.'

'But is it ART?'

'A role model? Yes, I suppose he was. Everywhere he went, people would say 'That's Bill Fenton... You don't want to be that guy!''

'The 873 people I laid off prove I'm a people person.'

'Never to be seen again!"

Might Versus Right.