Congress Connoisseur Pillows

"We can't do what his mother used to do to punish him?"

The First Annual Game Show Week.

"You call this a constitution?"

"But I see you're having difficulty following my argument."

GPC needs to make its new formula foolproof.

Men gossiping

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

"I wish my Dad would get off my back! It's only been nine years and he wants to know if I've picked a major yet!"

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

"No, no, that’s in a bar, Mr. President — you can talk politics and religion here."

I'd like to talk about absenteeism.

"Did you ask the client about product placement?"

Don't you worry JB, everything is fine here.

S**t Threw a Goose

"Nope! He'd never set eyes on a water cooler in all his years in the office!"

"I like them. They hate the same things we do."

Sculptor's chippings

'Would the person who's inhaling the very life out of this meeting please stop it right now?'

'He has a very open mind. Everything goes in one ear and out the other.'

"I said, you know why women talk more than men?" "What?" "I said, you know why women talk more than men..." "What?"

"We should probably talk about the elephant in the Roomba."

"Thank you, gentlemen, and may the best networked man win."

'Yeah, but this time she just said no -- there wasn't any hysterical laughter!'

"I can't wait to see our new ad campaign. Wait, don't tell me...it's NEW and IMPROVED!"

"I was really impressed by the way you sent back the wine, though it did come in second to the waiter's uppercut."

Bookshop: Our Bestsellers - Empty Phrases

" . . . and white, not yellow. Block, not shredded. Aged, but not too aged that it doesn't slice well."

White Wine Wisdom (2)

"Well, for starters, Matt has been showing definite improvement in risk-taking."

'It's really nice up here, but I miss all the negative political ads.'

Due to obsessive and intrusive attention by the Media, this news conference will be cancelled

'Come on! A computer can't plead the fifth.'

"There's a kind of rhythm to making money that something inside me responds to."