Conflict Hater Gifts

'I really hate conflict.'

"The kids love it, and it's saved my marriage."

"I find it best to stay out of office politics!"

Invade/Fail/Deny

'Isn't that a little extreme? - Cloning yourself just so you can use the carpool lane?'

Militant Pacifists

"You know I hate birthdays!"

"Well, so far I'm managing to stay above the fray."

Bob liked getting involved - but not actively involved.

Ukraine Crisis

"The Jacksons will be there in about an hour and I promise you guys an epic fight!"

Make love not war

Russia's Ukrainian Ambitions.

Confucius say: shut up.

'Oh you mean that silly little email.'

'Peace' in our time.

Kim Jong Il is angry!

'Actually, I hate places like this.'

'We're looking for new, original thinkers...people who can think 'outside the box'...'

With the Inflatable Pocket Potty, you'll never have to wait in line again at the stadium.

"I need to update my cloak of invincibility."

"This could get nasty..."

'Let's face it, we never got along. I'm just sorry it had to come to this.'

'What do you mean, we're incomapitble? We both like to fight.'

"This is the worst parade ever."

Modern Warfare

You can't go back.

"Passive-aggressive musical chairs." "You sit. I don’t deserve to" "I couldn’t possibly." "Maybe two of us could share." "Someone else go first." "I actually prefer standing."

The army tank with the olive branch at the end

"Here comes the ambassador now!"

"We'd like to begin by boarding all passengers who feel impatient."