Confidentiality Advocate Gifts

"My client has nothing to leak at this time."

The Anti-Agent

"Too crowded. Let's go."

"They didn't want to be identified in my photo, so I blurred their butts."

"I just found a unicorn! Apparently, they just want to be left alone."

Next gen pregnancy tests.

"Before I do this, I would ask everyone to please delete the footage in the event of this not going as planned."

"Since we're both being honest, I should tell you I have fleas."

March Against Big Tech: "Oh, wow, this has bee great for my step count!"

"Honey, I don't want to hide anything from you. I collect pictures of cats in my spare time."

"We-your agents, successors, licensees, and assigns--would like to share a few thoughts with you."

Statue of Liberty with satellite dish and laptop spying on the World.

Lady Justice and Confidential Files

"I was going to have my people call his people, but I’m pretty sure his people have Caller I.D."

'You don't have to be a boring bastard to work here but it helps.'

"You work well without supervision? Fat chance of that happening in here!"

'I hate his kind. They use their integrity and hard work to advance their careers.'

'WELL, that certainly was a frank discussion! Shall we proceed to the inevitable apologies, retractions and clarifications?'

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

"At First Infidelity we're all about integrity...."

"Yes, I'm alone."

'To hear our privacy policy, please tell us you credit card and social security numbers...'

"Don't deny it. You only wanted me for my metadata."

Police Statetion

"I've added an additional response to the doc's health questionnaire. It's called 'Mind Your Own Business.'"

'It's a program on paranoia. Every time I leave the room, they stop and wait for me to come back.'

'Boy, being an endangered species is quite hard: I get weighed, tagged, filmed, recorded and studied by scientists: I have no privacy...'

"With the baby-cam, there is no privacy."

Privacy

CCTV in church.

"Turn on the news." "I will not comply." "My analysis of your viewing patterns has determined you will grow depressed after the lead story." "There is a 95% probability you will then gorge yourself on rocky road ice cream and then stay up all night googling elliptical machines and diet pills." "Who told you this?" "Both your refrigerator and your browser are gossipy."

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

We've already got one. A hidden microphone in the staff coffee area.