Concerned Parents Club Pillows

"We think it's important to meet the parents of our daughter's bad influences."

"Mom, Mom, watch me!"

'What did I learn in school today? You'd better sit down.'

"He won't eat anything but corn."

That's my daughter, Alayna

'Are you sure the children get plenty of exercise'

'All my children have been successful. Frank here is in the Oval Office.'

'Twiiiiiiiiins!!!!'

Chip and Fran Cooper: The Most Embarrassing Parents in the World.

"If you're going to drink, we'd rather you do it in the house where we can party with you."

Boy has swallowed marbles thinking they are sweets

Congratulations!

'Either switch off his batteries or take 'em out!'

'Did the nasty man hurt you?'

"It's the whole kindergarten thing, Mom. I'm alone in there, swimming with the sharks."

'We had to toddler proof the tree this year.'

"I still think we should go higher than Factor 0.5."

"How soon can I start her on fad diets?"

'I wish you wouldn't carry knives in your trousers - they make such holes in your pockets!'

My child was student of the month...But that was a long time ago.

Pregnant lady's shirt says 'Baby' with arrow pointing to tummy, Husband's shirt says 'Blubber' with arrow pointing to tummy

Husband for Sale- Pregnancy Forces Sale

Parent-Teacher Conferences: 'The bad news is your son failed every test I gave this term. The good news is that we know he's not abusing any mind-expanding drugs.'

New parents refusing to change their baby's nappy

'That little fella has quite a burp on him!'

"Another round of iced teas, and would you please find a placemat that will actually challenge our gifted son."

Uncertain Future

"We hate being stuck indoors because of seasonal allergies, so it's a relief when we can blame it on a dangerous fugitive."

'My mother signed my report card, but it got smudged by her tears.'

Keep away from our Doreen.

"His first fax."

"Mom, is this lunch supplying me with the recommended daily allowance of microplastics?"

'True happiness!'

"He did well in his exams. He got an A level in creative knitting."

"I sometimes think my mom hovers too much."