Computer Rookie Pillows

"How long have you had this fear of computers?"

"I'm still trying to get used to ordering food online."

"I can't find my other boot. I need to be rebooted."

BOOKSHOP, 'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit today, sir -- a ream of paper and a dozen pencils.'

"That was too many fresh original voices for one night."

"I want one that detects intrusions by hackers, then blows their computers to bits!"

"Dad's at that awkward age when he knows just enough about computers to really screw 'em up!"

"He's at that awkward age...he knows just enough about computers to really screw them up."

Essex computer.

STRIP Hambone: Number cruncher

"I had to hire younger employees to keep up with today's technology and social media."

Look, dork, I won't ask again. Will you help me use a computer? Maybe. What for? Internet Scrabble. I hear it is possible to play – what is the word? Online? I should like to send data over cyberspace. Through cyberspace.

"At least you have taste when it comes to your computer's wallpaper."

"Don't worry Mac, I'll have that happy face back in no time."

'I guess this is what we get for going to a discount web-page designer.'

"Tonight, Daddy's going to teach you how to stay save on the internet."

Bubbie Selfies

'I hereby sentence you to 40 years labor in an office with fluorescent lighting, just enough salary to keep you alive...'

Computer books for dummies.

"I'm sure he was a great blocker when he was playing, but I doubt he'll be a great ad blocker."

STRIP Hambone: "System been down long?"

"Never ask Dad about technology. He thinks a semiconductor is someone who leads the Boston Pops for half a year."

'How can he remember 37 passwords but always forget to pick his clothes up off the floor?'

"You butt dialed me 187 times in less that an hour, dad."

By the time I figured out how to read her e-book, she was asleep.

"Sorry, closed today. Our humans are down."

STRIP Hambone: Training wheels on a computer

In-Tray, Out-Tray and Lost.

"He's young and eager to change the world, but I'd be happy if he'd just change his underwear."

"Let's take it step by step. How do I turn it on?"

"Banking, booking flights, shopping - there's no limit to what he can't do on the internet."

'Hello, technical support? Which one is the 'any key'?'

'We're taking baby steps with this whole social media thing until we're certain it pans out.'

"Please—no technology questions!"

Video Chat with Dad from his new smart phone.