Compliance Whiz Pillows

"Son, you're old enough now to learn about something we call 'compliance'...."

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

"Staff support"

Out and In.

'Please leave the light on, dear. I'm afraid there might be OSHA inspectors under the bed.' 'Managers at Night.'

The Importance of Planning Thoroughly in Advance

'We've cut and pasted your list into 84 arbitrary sub-lists. Well, our work here is done.'

"The Wi-Fi password is publish 'publish or perish'."

"You're in luck...I've unearthed those payroll records from 3 years ago."

August is corporate earnings restatement season.

Dr. Unzimer's mother appears... "Teddy, you call this a 'clean room'?"

"UK government aren’t budging boss. Sole supplier or not under the new procurement regulations our new contract has to have three KPIs..."

'This is a very dysfunctional company. No one will talk aboaut about the elephant in the boardroom!'

"Uh oh, here come more regulations."

'There's no need for confusion. Part 935 of Mining Regulation 823, Section 323 in Article L clearly states . . . '

'Nice work. A fluid work force with a minimum of drips.'

'You remember Mr. Horton? You know, the one you said to give the 'clean desk' award to? -- you fired him three years ago.'

'Hang on a minute! We forgot to write down that check number in the giant register...'

"Is there any way we can skip right to adulthood and start being in charge?"

"I can see you and I'm still too busy."

'I need someone to fill my shoes and be in them when the SEC come calling.'

Access Assessments

'Federal Bureau of Technological Compliance - May I help you?'

'Can Hart, Wendell, Blaine & Norbrook come out to merge?'

'These are the people who'll be line managing you.'

News. Economy Grows. They say the economy is growing! Probably, it's certainly outgrown me!

GDPR compliant

Boss talking to lawyer, 'These new Terms and Conditions you've drafted for us are extremely long and overly complex - our customers are never going to be able to understand them. Well done Jones!'

'He's the most important man here - He writes the compliance procedures for the DEPARTMENT of Compliance!'

Super hero enforces handicapped parking law.

'We don't want to interfere to much, just a couple of things...what you do and how you do it!'

"Welcome to the building, Mrs. Bergdorf. We'd like to go over the condo's rules with you."

'You're a spineless, craven, frightened little man, Bradberg - I like that in an employee.'

'I'm fully organized. Now I can freak out in some kind of order!'

'Run this by 'Legal,' but sprint it by 'Ethics.''