Competitive Jollymaker Gifts

Our life is better than yours Christmas letters

'Just a word of advice ... He's a Saints' fan.'

Fleas Navidad.

"Merry Christmas"

Mr Claus, tests indicate your blood is 95% milk and cookies.

Al's Diner. Special: Spaghetti. All You Can Eat $3.95. Ernie, don't play with your food unless you're sure you can win.

Danth battle?

"Just as I feared. Tariffs."

Father Christmas uses laptop on roof. Man says: 'I think someone is stealing our wi-fi.'

"I've had. . . um. . . just a small sherry. . ."

Why are you insisting on spending Christmas in hospital, Gran? I prefer the Santa here, darling.

'Apparently our postcode qualifies us for Government sponsored loft insulation.'

"Looks like somebody brought a blanky to a pillow fight."

The Cricketer and the Golfer

Snowman throws snowball at Santa.

"Maybe this year..."

Pole jumper about to land on a giant whoopi cushion.

'What do you expect? A red bulb burned out, and you're free till Christmas.'

Elf of the Month

'Just one more and this puppy is headed for another bar.'

Santa Claus stuck in a chimney sitting in a hospital emergency room.

Skateboard Olympics.

During a respite in union negotiations, simmering tensions boil over as some disgruntled members of the toymakers elf union take matters in their own hands.

C is for Cracker

Santa entering a pool for a swim

'Your dad only works one day a week but mine only works ONE day a year!'

Santa School.

'I understand that you only use your vehicle once a year, Mr. Claus, but you drive over a million miles that night. That's why your premium is so high.'

'On the outside I'm all ho-ho-ho. But inside I feel weak and shaky, like a bowl full of jelly.'

A Man mixing up his sports.

Easter Island heads bunny ears.

Oh, yeah? Well, my dad can reach a higher plane of consciousness than your dad!

"Better - but it was still too obvious when you went for the pine tar under your hat."

Santa's grotto advertising 'Talk to Santa', is next to a diet clinic with a sign in the window, 'Santa, talk to us.'

'You can't borrow the sleigh tonight- it's Christmas Eve!'