Company Car Critic Pillows

"...and you've got private use of it, so long as you don't exceed 10,000 mile per annum.'

Polluted geese

'No, don't tell me, your electric garage door is broken.'

'I'm willing to go that extra mile because I have a company car.'

"This baby gets such horrible miles per gallon, you actually save on gas because nobody can afford to drive it!"

'This is Citroen Picasso's cubist period.'

'The shareholders are in an uproar; they demand change. Bob, switch seats with Gerald.'

"Unclean demon, in the name of the saint I command you to leave the spirit of this man and to take from him his unholy desire to drive an SUV!"

"I won't go near one of those driver-less things until they iron out the bugs."

'That tut, tut sound when you park..? It's your husband.'

Sports futility vehicles

'We'd like to take it for a test drive.'

"I like everything about the car except it's expression."

The development of cars.

Clown in clown car, "Well I don't think the company car is such a perk"

Insensitive driving school - 'That was crap.'

Huge traffic jam:Sign reads 'Debate on road pricing, next exit'.

'And this little warning light flashes when the outside air becomes too polluted to breathe.'

Speed Bump

"With this car Mister, the girls will find you irresistible"

Woman going to wash partners car with wire wool.

'Of course, you're probably concerned with mileage and the high gas prices. . .'

"You know... these speed camera shots are the only photos we have of that car."

"The worse thing about being fired was giving back the company car!"

Mushroom cloud from a car's exhaust pipe.

"At last! We've finally reduced our dependency on foreign oil."

"It's a company car. They gave it to me right before I stopped showing up for work."

'This model was proudly built in the USA by Mexican workers on Chinese wages.'

"And of course you get a company car!"

Are you happy? Sure, great company to work for and great company car!

Directions to the nearest decent motorway services.

'It must have good gas mileage because it hasn't even been started in two decades.'

'Car maker management made big bucks screwing up for years, and can you believe, Republicans are blaming the UNIONS!'