Commute Comedian Pillows

Linda mad a killing during slow-moving commuter traffic.

Maud was a real backseat driver.

"British Rail regrets the delay of......"

Warning - This vehicle frequently cuts people off/up. " My please yield sign wasn't working."

'Turn right at the first $4.09 unleaded, then a hang a left at $4.03 unleaded, and over the bridge, past the $4.01 unleaded...'

"Take me home now!"

Rush Hour In The Jungle.

"Me, it's not a shower I crave for after a hard day at work, it's a long, long, long bath..."

"I have found a house in your price range, but it will be a long commute every day from Greenland."

"As usual, the Madison Avenue boat is late again."

"I dreamed last night that I had a job within walking distance."

A delay of train drivers

'One of my ancestors died at Waterloo.'

'He brought along that short-wave radio just so he can listen to the commuter traffic reports from home.'

'Sorry Darling, I'll be late home: There's a strong head wind...'

Rail Platform Information: I Speak Your Wait.

White City Tube.

'Would ya look at those clowns passing everybody!'

"...He's been going to work in a wheelie bin. He says its quicker, cleaner and less cramped"

Anti-Fraud Drive.

Martian Rovers find proof of intelligent life on the red planet.

"Hey, you wanna share a cab?"

Trapeze artists commuting

"Attention passengers, this train will be running express to whichever stop is after yours."

QUINTUPLE BYPASSES EXPLAINED.

Excess Baggage: Before starting your rental car, be sure the radio is turned all the way down.

Another Filibuster from the Secretary of the Interior of My Car

Motorway notices reading: 'Fog. But if you can read this, it isn't that bad'.

"Road construction used to bother me. But compared to all the craziness going on in the world, I'll take this any day."

"I know there are people who look like their pets, but..."

Beep' 'beep' 'beep' 'beep'' - 'Slam!' - 'Great... another long week of pain and humiliation ahead...' - ''Click'' - 'God, Ilove my job.' - '' -

Things Women Never Say: 'Sorry I'm late boss. I was talking to my husband and he wouldn't stop listening.'

Honey I'm Home

Need a Lawyer?

65. Whenever I'm in the mood to watch the rest of the world go by, I simply keep to the legal speed limit.