Community Safety Gifts

"Don't you think you're taking this whole, 'neighbourhood watch' thing a little too serious, dear?"

Police Contract Talks

A Terrible Choice

No One Could Have Seen This Coming

Community notice board.

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

Man using to much bug spray

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

"Chaplain, the lord should put warning labels on some of his creations."

'Dewey! Grandpa's stuck again. Give him a couple of whacks upside the head.'

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

Caution: Driver Watching "Hard Copy"

Kangaroo mom to child, 'We're not going anywhere until you buckle-up, young man.'

'You're right. Our old safety files have become a safety concern.'

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

"Could you all please pay attention while I go through the emergency procedure. . ."

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

Baby on board.

"Jimmy, I want you to meet our new safety officer."

"Did you bring any protection with you?"

'Well, you got the dog to protect you against criminals. Perhaps now you'll have to hire a criminal to protect you from the dog.'

On the brink.

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

Two people in hazmat suits lie in bed

'It was going well - until his power suit short-circuited.'

"We need a union!'

"Hey, that's disgusting! You can't leave that on the footpath: Make sure your master comes and picks it up!"

"They retired me. Just like that. Seems I'm no good over 55 mph anymore." "How does that make you feel?" "Like I want to bash my head against a wall!"

"I suppose you want the rest of the day off!"

"I've had it with the helmet mandates."

"Why don't you start with tennis balls?!"