Community Life Observer Pillows

'Wentworth Street, Whitechapel'

"Living in a city with functional infrastructure must be so boring."

'This country is on the road to ruin.' - 'Well, it'll never get there in this traffic.'

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

"You're not the same pupa you were when we first met."

"It's his emotional support animal."

St. Elmo's fired.

"Mom said mopping up my snow tracks is a good start for my bucket list."

You trip on it, you buy it.

Down on Bourbon Street...

Thanks, I'd like to accept the job, but what is the salary? Sorry, it's against company policy to disclose that!

'She's the worst gossip I've ever come across.'

'When the baby sitter gets a standing ovation, I don't know whether to be pleasantly surprised or suspicious.'

"Bob, you've been warned before. You can't come to prayer just to gather gossip material."

Will Kill For Food

'Fortunately, ideas like these don't come along everyday.'

"This neighborhood has a strong sense of community that borders on siege mentality."

"Think you could teach your kid to throw straight?"

'He lives in a house, and it's by the side of the road, but he's still not a friend to man.'

Junior's Towel

Street: The Magazine for Homeless People

"I know there are people who look like their pets, but..."

"Better idea! Let's obstruct traffic in the guy's neighborhood and make his morning commute difficult!"

"I'm starting to miss the summer people. It's been weeks since I glowered."

"Please help! God struck me blind for not giving to a blind beggar."

"I remember when this was all forest..."

"We were hoping that you could work from work today."

"Thrown under the bus stop."

"You must be brave now, Randolph! You. . . You. . . You are adopted!"

Currently Down-Sizing

"Would you be willing to participate in a brief survey following this transaction concerning customer satisfaction?"

"Hey, don't forget man's best friend!"

Wendel maps his trip to the germaphobe society headquarters.

"It's a cereal box. It's not supposed to be interactive!"