Communication Conundrums Pillows

'I did not receive your letter, and besides I didn't like the things you said in it.'

Tongue Tied.

"I'll take this book. A buddy recommended it to me. . . no idea why. Holy crap! You're one helluva hot chick!!"

'What makes you think no-one understands you?'

Communication Breakdowns

'Maybe we should talk to him more, Malcolm.'

"How should I know what I'm thinking? I'm not a mind reader."

'Ask about our daily sermon by fax plan.'

'I can't talk to my wife - all she says is `Baaah! Baaah!`!

"I never understand what you're trying to say."

"Mr. Stilz asked Jean to ask Genie to ask Kelley to ask Dawn to ask Lisa to tell you he'd like to see you in his office."

ACCOUNTANT-IN-RESIDENCE: "John, we're going to have to cut back on the cadmiums."

'I've met someone else unwilling to share his feelings with me.'

"The company's information flow is really simple: the boss doesn't tell the department managers anything, they don't talk to the team managers, who withhold everything from the workers."

'You know that's not what I meant when I asked you to take the dog out!'

"I say 'tomarto', he says 'tomayto', I say 'portarto', he says 'potayto'. Why else do you think we're here?"

Woman holding two phones together.

"Matey! Me cell connection's down. Throw me a landline!"

"Nurse, can you send in the interpreter for Senora Delgado?"

NHS England to ensure all GPs can work from home if isolating.

'You have 17 new conflicting messages...'

Hard of Hearing Institute.

Cow wants to quit, but can't say anything helpful when he needs to.

'It's your wife - firing off another text message!'

"I don't respond to threats. Or e-mails, by the way"

Old People Whisperer

'Are you giving me the silent treatment? I can't tell.'

"Hi! I'm on the trina."

Smart phone Problems

"In a world of 'from's' and 'to's', I always seem to be a 'cc'."

'Remember when we had to go into a sound-proof telephone box to make a public phone call?'

Hotline.

'Could you... maybe just write me a little note about it?'

"It's not that we don't interact, it's that we don't NOT interact."

'We can send a message around the world in a fraction of a second so why does it take so long to get through a quarter inch of human skull?'