Commitment-phobic Analyst Pillows

'I'm just concerned that if we embrace change this one time, change might get the wrong idea and mistake it for some kind of long-term commitment!'

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

'Do you think it might be possible that what you wear could be a contributing factor to your relationship problems?'

" ... and peace be with you, although not likely."

Just married and Just Single and Happy.

'No, but thanks for asking,'

"What I really wanted was a dog, but my landlord won't allow it. So I got married instead."

'Is that 'forsaking all others' bit compulsory?'

'Or you can rent by the week...'

"Yes ... no!"

"Instead of making a long-term commitment to marriage, I've decided to lease a man."

"I really like this one – but I'm afraid of getting hurt again."

Hello, Susie, it's R

'Don't try to sweet talk me, Eddie! You had your chance yesterday! We are through!'

"Before I say, I do. Just let me run those vows past my best lawyer."

Monogamy

Man playing with echos: 'Hellooooo...How are you....I love you...' 'I'm not ready for that kind of committment!'

'I wonder if you'd go out with me. I've always wanted to go to couples therapy.'

"I never get a girls name tattooed on a first date."

"When we met, Marc promised to be the wind under my wings but it turned out to be all hot air."

'I do - allowing for a 50 margin of error...'

"And you're telling me this because?"

Dating Death

'I'm beginning to have second thoughts. I understand that cute wedding photographer is single.'

"I'm sorry son, was that, 'I do', or 'please kill me'?"

'I don't know, Randy - Marriage is so INTRUSIVE.'

'Well, yes, when you put it that way, I am a selfish male afraid of commitment, but 'Lone Wolf' sounds better...'

"Bernie has fear of commitment - He thinks the American Psychiatric Association is out to get him."

Woman thinking - "But is it a real relationship?"

"I need you, Roberta. Deep inside me there's a married man aching to get out."

'On second thought, maybe we should see other people.'

"These oaths aren't binding all weekend are they?"

'Are you sure you want to save your marriage?'

'What d'you mean - you've changed your minds?'

'And do you Emily, take George as your lawful partner until death, or the cute guy in accounts, do you part!'