Commercialization Skeptic T-Shirts

"Tsk, tsk, tsk. . . already marked down for clearance and it's not even Halloween yet."

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

'The growing disparity of income is a tribute to our acumen.'

I know it seems a bit misplaced, but it does pay all the wedding expenses !'

That private little woodland walk you used to love now with a: Visitors' Experience Centre!

"Can you give me your opinion on the 'Paid for' magazines debate?" "Sure...but it will cost you"

'Oh, the guru is up on the next peak -- I'm his agent.'

Privatized Jails

Buy One Get One Free Sign Outside Shoe Shop

are you so alienated from any real form of community that you can no longer distinguish between belonging and conforming?

"Halloween stuff already? It's August!"

"Which will it be - do we label it '20% free', and raise the price 20%, or label lit '40% free', and raise the price 40%?"

'Office of P.G.Barley and Clones'

"It must be near New Year's Day...There are Easter eggs in the shop windows!"

"Multi-level marketing!"

Mall Ahead - Be prepared to shop.

Cash Rebate

Corporate Advertising Agency: WEEKLY SCAM MEETING

"My only hope is that future generations honor this day of independence with a huge one-day sale."

"The genetic engineers gave him that birthmark as part of a sponsership deal."

"...No, he can't really fly...no, the bad guys really don't have a ray gun...no, this cereal really isn't the best food in the whole world...no, it won't make you as strong as a giant..."

Your weight. See, it's up not down. I told you "thin crust" pizza did not mean it would magically slim you.

'I spend the winter in Sarasota now, since I sold my entire list to telemarketers.'

"If we new this was going to happen we could have arranged some great TV sponsorship deals."

Addicted to Oil

"The improvement is the higher price."

Mt. Everest gifts.

"It's flu season, so you'll probably get sick. To repeat: You... will... get... sick. And when you do, there's Helpaflu."

"On the web it clearly said, 'one mile from the beach'."

"It's not as good a deal as it sounds - it's based on THEIR lifetime."

"Now paid subscribers will have access to as much free content as non-subscribers."

'Well, I'm AGAINST adding a course in business methods to the curriculum....

"Thanks to Trump, no one cares if we lie now in our advertisements or press releases."

'The champ will make twenty million from this fight, mainly from selling advertising space on his shorts...'

"Are you a platinum card member?"