Comical Courtship Lover Gifts

"For all we know, a giant meteor could fall out of the sky and eradicate us all. So what do you say we make a little prehistory together?"

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

"Remember that time you tried to kill me?"

'This should be perfect. The main characters fall in love during a series of explosions.'

Questions about an old case refuse to go away. . .

'Okay.. what the hell.'

"Call me?"

"Did you bring any protection with you?"

"I'm just a girl, standing in front of a buoy..."

'Apparently the stag party has gone into extra time.'

"When I ask questions, I expect answers!"

"It started rather well, but then, you sang two wrong notes, so that's a fail in my book. Try again at the next mating season..."

Love is in the air...

'That reminds me of the blind date I had last weekend!'

'Big date tonight, but I've just shed an antler: Do you have superglue?'

"Happy Anniversary, dear! It's a gold spray-painted macaroni necklace."

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

Reading the sports pages.

Pole vaulter jumping Lover's Leap.

Salt and Pepper

...My feng shui would be incompatible with your sumo wrestling.

"If you think I ride too fast, Susan...just say so!"

"Honk if you love me!"

Lady asking her fiance's son if she can be his new mother.

Boyfriend of the Month.

A Prickly Pair

"It's a Wonderful Life" if it was written by scientists.

"What's so wrong with always living in the present?"

"It's about time."

"The doctor is in court on Tuesdays and Wednesdays."

Early man wasn't exactly enthusiastic about the development of language.

"Not guilty by reason of genetic determinism, Your Honor."

'Don't worry, Alice. I won't leave you.'

George Clooney Machine

"You don't sniff my butt anymore."