Comical Contrast Seeker Gifts

"....But....flu season's over."

Clown on bike.

Golfer Shouts at Ball to Go Into Hole.

Polar Bear ice fishing through igloo.

The difference between cosmology and cosmetology.

'But they told me to take her down to theatre...'

"We'll destroy it to the ground ... ...and then..."

"We're ecstatic about our new au pair."

"Let's face it. The only play you've ever liked is 'Stop the World - I Want to Get Off.'"

Man see a sign on door of Clayton's Jokes & Gags Shopee - 'Please Use Second Door To The Right'

"My God!! - Those actors must all be really old by now...!"

Knights of the bedside table.

Look At Me I'm Still Wearing Shorts.

"This year I resolve to embrace change."

Dedication to excellence....

"What's the final episode of 'Seinfeld' about?""It's about nothing."

'You gonna finish that lemon peel?'

Noah's ark, many lions

'You can all relax and resume your game. The unattended bag discovered on the infield turned out to be the second base.'

I'm starting to think our new hardwood floor is made of driftwood.

"I tell ya - if I ever stop moving, I'll die."

Zoo animals.

"Relax, folks! I’m a lawyer. I can always find loopholes!"

"Promise me that if I die first you won't eat me."

'We never had all these labour-saving devices in my young day!'

Just a little seasoning...

"How come there's no feel-good performance art?"

"Hold on - I need to tell the credit card company I'm going on a trip."

"Excuse me, but have you ever thought of play the mandolin?"

"Aaaaugh! It's the Zombie Alpacalypse!"

"Definitive." "Compelling." "Persuasive." "Upside down."

'How did you arrive at this price?' - 'Our computer has a new random generator.'

'I'm sorry Timmy, but if I keep going for help, you'll never learn to take care of yourself,'

Fishing.

Knights queue up to attempt to pull excalibur with a claw machine.