Comic Food Enthusiast Pillows

'The stuff legends are made of'

Frank & Ernie's Diner. Special: Scrabbled Eggs. No, sir, it's not a misprint -- Ernie adds alphabet soup.

Filet minion

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

"Great job of acting! You really appeared excited about Aunt May's 'famous' green bean casserole."

Lockdown casserole

Where 'Turkey Bacon" Comes From

As I say, local produce, locally produced; all our meats tonight come form our local meat processing plant.

'You caught 'em. You clean 'em.'

Restaurant menu board: 'Day old - 2 day old - 3 day old'

Murderous Chef

'I hate it when they order scrambled eggs.' (chef shaking chicken).

'In case of fire, don't panic. Pay your bill then leave.'

"Man does not live by chips alone. There's also guacamole."

'Good news - we're merging with Mellman's Jelly and Alpine Toast.'

Waiter: 'Your Tossed salad Ma'am.'

'I thought a perfect martini would cover the 'well balanced' requirement of my night to cook.'

Cook au vin

'He's cured.'

Large Very Fresh Eggs

Grand rounds vs. ground rounds.

Lemon beelzebub for table 666

"The other waiters just spit in the food of rude customers, not in their faces!"

'Deputy, I asked 'when are you going to a restaurant?' Not 'arrest your aunt'.'

"Keep it in the sling and rub hot sauce on our wing every 4 hours."

'Well, that's the last of the garlic repellent.'

'Aw, cool! Look! They got us a hot tub!'

'I tried the new restaurant today: they have a three course menu...'

'Apparently, the carrot cake really is to die for.'

And then I said, "Gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble ..." So he said "Gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble ..." Of course, I had to say, "Gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble, gobble ..." It happens every year -0 the turkey never fails to put him to sleep!"

'So this is a kitchen!'

"I try not to be picky, but this meal is a bit too sticky!"

"You're not totally useless around the house - you make a great appetite suppressant."

'In a four-star restaurant, one's hat does not fall into the cassoulet de castenaudary. But if ones hat does fall into the cassoulet de castelnaudary, one does not put it back on one's head.'

'Whale DNA was added to my embryo and now all I crave is plankton.'