Comic Book Writer Gifts

"You've been really interesting ever since we got through your origin story."

"That whole, 'fast than a speeding bullet' think suddenly makes sense!"

'The Neurosis Pack.'

Captain Pointy No.43 - Static Clingman was annoying

'Being a superhero doesn't mean that everything about me is super you know!'

In a twinkling, Rover shed his leash and became Duke, Wonder Dog of Kansas city.

Superbaldie.

Awful Alternate Histories.

'Curses. . . It's Super Ticklish. If we only knew his weakness.'

"Well—yeah, maybe I could use a sidekick."

What super-villains get their kids for Christmas.

"Who's Ivy?"

"Look, it's my word balloon."

"It's 10 cents not 5 cents."

The Amazing Man-Spider

"... And precisely how long have you been reading underground comix?"

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

Zombie standup

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

"We only got six days of funding."

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

"Either that's Marmaduke with a lizard's head in front of us, or I really mixed up my meds."

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

Superheroes take a selfie

"Don’t worry, this guy is totally cool. Just don’t mention the Red Baron."

"You've changed."

"Can you make me look like Wolverine?"

"The Hound of the Baskervilles, Watson--I took him walkies!"

"Honey, where did you put my Green Lantern cufflinks?!"

"That's her - that's the girl who broke into our house! But her hair was 'goldier'."

Super-Tia makes Mal de Ojo undo its curse!

"Ever eat a bird?"

Superheroes Having a Drink

"I'm gonna be a 'New Yorker' cartoonist. You're not supposed to understand it."

"Spoiler alert! I'm about to tell you the part that really bugged me about 'Wolverine.'" "You don't have to say 'spoiler alert,' minion. It's been a month." "Anyone who hasn't seen it yet has not fulfilled their role as a dutiful consumer, and deserves whatever spoilage they will receive." "In fact, let me know who they are and I'll enter them into my database. When the corporatist revolution comes, there will be consequences." "Um... never mind."