Comedy Scene Appreciator Gifts

'Where were you on the night of October 31st?'

"He's very advanced for his age"

Hold up during magic trick.

'Here you go, kid! A worm.'

'The iceman cometh too soon!'

Cow's Last Will and Testament.

"For the last time stupid, you're tin man, you are not by any leap of the imagination, anything like Iron Man!"

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

The Ferocious Viking Wiener Dog

'I believe we've located the cause of your back problem, Mrs. Kangaroo.'

M.T. accidentally triggers the predator pursuit response.

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

Fly Fishing

Frank was certain his Bird of Paradise mating dance would press all the right buttons with Margaret.

Moses' Tablet

Saint George and the Drag Queen

Ten Plagues for Today's Seder

'I heard the Board was talking about kicking you, but I don't know if it's upstairs or out.'

'Yorick? No, I don't think so, unless of course he was a Neanderthal!'

The Pink Bantha

...gon make you sweat...gon make you groove

Falstaff

Wordplay: In The Bag.

Cat Burglar

Songs about Texas, next 1100 miles.

"Do you see that inexplicably beautiful hydrangea over there?… Nature calls."

Caption contest. After last year's 3,000 entries, we're doing it again! Visit Speedbump.com for info and send your entries to speedbumpcomic@comcast.net.

"OK, fine. Perhaps 'sower of discord in the lower depths of hell' was overstating it."

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

'I asked Will if he wrote it. He said he wasn't sure.'

"Your MBA and PHD are impressive but what concerns me is your low number of Facebook friends."

"It's basically the 'Tragedy of King Lear' but with animated penguins."

'Your fur looks like you slept in it.'

'I suppose you want Polly to forget she heard that.'

"Bill is in charge of our Ethics Department."