Comedy King/queen T-Shirts

'And do you, Rex, promise not to take sides?'

'That'll be the tenth time Columbus has visited the virgin islands this week.'

"Davina McCall: Life at the Extreme takes a celebrity to the most extreme places on Earth!"

Stand-up Romcom

'Great Therapy!'

'How do you like my fantasy weekend so far?'

'His workout regimen consists of 50 sit-downs every day.'

Junior barrister prompting a deaf and testy chief

To read or not to read?

"I hate you! You don't understand me and you don't understand my software!"

'Don't be so dramatic and get into my office!'

'Hey, buddy, do you mind lending me a hand? I appear to be stuck in this thing.'

'Your Grandpa achieved greatness, he thrust greatness upon me, and then you were born great!'

'The dog ate my homework -- I thought maybe you could X-ray him.'

Waving from Behind the Curtain

'You're not really that much help, Ben.'

'I'm a star!'

"The artist-in-residence is struggling a bit, but other than that we're fine."

'If you're going to marry this geek, I suggest you get the extended warranty.'

'This new jester doth appeal to me.'

"You have a really lousy sense of humor."

'That's a personal foul, roughing the passer!'

Theatrical emotion of Mr. Vincent Crummles

'How animals mark their territory'

"All of my visitors have to wear that get up. Apparently my humour is very infectious."

"Deal with it Your Majesty- Comedy is king!"

Up your end.

'You're not supposed to use fabric softener on ARMOR!'

"Look at me, everyone! I'm amazing!"

"I followed the money and it led me to Edgar."

"I'd like an application form for the position of minister, please!"

'What shall we watch - best security videos of 2013 or operating room bloopers, blunders and bleeps?'